Friday, October 2, 2015

Fall Forward

https://www.facebook.com/DavidAvocadoWolfe/videos/10153024488451512/


I wish that I could have embedded this video.  But I just didn't know if and how it was possible to embed a Facebook video onto Blogger.   I highly suggest you click onto the link above.  David Wolfe did a fantastic job putting images and video along side with Denzel Washington's commencement speech this past fall.  

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Bridezilla... Me!?!?!??

So have I mentioned that I got engaged!?!?!  No?  You mean I haven't mentioned or shared even just one little picture from my Norwegian vacation (which is when it happened)!?!?!  Oh, yah... I've been too busy trying to find a wedding venue.  I've been a complete bat shit crazy person for the past... month.  :(

Originally, before we ever got engaged we had talked about a destination wedding.  At first I wasn't a fan, but then the idea started to grow on me.  So when we finally did become engaged, I started to search islands in the Caribbean.  Then the idea occurred to me that a fall wedding could very well be possible too.  We got engaged in the middle of August, so we had well over a year.  I absolutely love the fall and even though it's tough (as a teacher especially) to do the fall, a Columbus Day wedding could definitely work.  Well... back in August, I quickly learned how even quicker things book up.

I love fresh air and scenery.  So, I was looking for a more rustic chic/winery/indoor-outdoor type of wedding rather than ballroom/country club type of wedding.  Since NYC (our hometown) was never part of the plan, I first began looking an hour or so outside of the city.  We did find and visited one place that had but only 1 open date to choose from, but John wasn't crazy about it.  At the time, I didn't realize how ridiculously hard this was going to be, so I was okay with turning it down.  I had to expand my search to every winery/barn/rustic type venue across New York State and Northern Pennsylvania.  Nothing.  Honestly, I don't like every one that I come across on the Internet.  The ones that I do like, well so does everyone else, and they are not available.

So I expanded my search to outside of NYS.  I looked at wineries in CA and even outside of Seattle.  We never said destination meant Caribbean/tropical only.  I've found some beautiful places.  The kind of places that fit exactly what I envision, but can't seem to find here in NYS with even the ones I have liked best here.  But after much thought, I ruled out a west coast wedding.  The reason:  time money and planning.  I don't want a destination that will take long to get to and I don't want it to cost my guests an arm and leg to get there.  Of course these places that I love are rather out there and would just add on additional travel time to our guests who are coming from only 1 of 2 places, NYC or Buffalo.

It was time to expand my search in a different way... season.  When I realized that New Year's Eve fell on a Saturday next year, it wasn't difficult to let go of the fall wedding because despite my dislike for NYE, I couldn't help but to fall in love with a NYE wedding.  I even opened the door up to a more elegant ballroom venue (a barn ain't cutt'n it in December up here) and we took a weekend to visit my hometown neck of the woods to visit a few venues in Buffalo.  Out of 4, there was 1 that would have worked very well with a NYE wedding and it was actually available on that day!  However, John was concerned with having a destination wedding in a very cold, grey place in the winter (because it would be a destination for the majority of our guests who would be coming in from NYC).

So then it was back to search the Caribbean again.  I decided on Puerto Rico, for a few reasons.  1.  It is mountainous and is lush with green.  I'm not so much the beach gal.  2.  It is one of the easies islands to get to from Buffalo (NYC is easy to most).  3.  I've been there before and don't feel completely blind.  4.  It's US territory!  Love my country!  I've found a few places, one that I love!  It's in the rainforest and the ceremony looks onto the mountains!  I figured we could do the rehearsal dinner on the oceanfront and have the best of both worlds!  So since I tried very hard to keep it local and was unsuccessful, I felt relieved and happy to feel like we were getting close to finding a venue.  We even have a trip booked to PR for next weekend to check out these places.

But... I am now having a semi-panic attack because I am so upset with having to ask people to pay to come to my wedding.  I know that sometimes hotels are needed and there's gas and tolls to pay for when going to a wedding to, I've done it myself.  But I mean we're talking flights, days away from home, etc.  I don't know, I'm feeling very uncomfortable about it.  So much so that I am now back again searching for more local weddings, local meaning western and south western parts of PA and now going back to some of the other venues in NYS that I didn't look at the first 10 times around.  I'm very tired of looking for places and now that I am more open to all types of venues and seasons, the summer, fall, and even late winter booked already throughout next year.  Or it doesn't accommodate the amount of people we are inviting.  Or it's in the middle of nowhere between NYC and Buffalo and I can't help but to wonder why would I have my wedding here?

I've been married before.  I do know how this all works.  I'm trying to learn from, not mistakes, but from having the knowledge of doing this before of what is really important and what isn't.  The guests are important.  My guest list is small, but there isn't anyone on my list that I feel that I have to invite.  I'm inviting them because I want them there.  The only thing that is hard for me is that unless I get married in my hometown or within about an hour radius of it, my grandparents can't come.  PR, NYC... doesn't matter and that is hard to swallow.

However, this wedding celebration is about the celebration part.  Sound awful?  Sound like I lost the true meaning?  Well, here's why...  After Dale, the idea of marriage scared me.  Terrified me.  So much so that I would have rather had another child as a single parent rather than marry again.  But then I met John.  And we moved in together.  And the idea was not so scary anymore.  Actually, I (we) feel that I don't even really need to marry, in our minds we already are.  For me, it was a process to get to this point.  It was a struggle and it was triumph to get to the point where I could allow and accept happiness in from another man and to not feel guilty about it and to finally, finally feel comfortable in the shoes of my new life.  So the actual wedding part, seems almost silly (almost!).  The serious mental and emotional commitment already took place.  We do want to make it official, the legality makes it easier.  

More than anything, we want to celebrate...  John, the guy who never thought he would marry (and to a woman with a child makes it all the more wondrous, lol) and me, the widow who crawled out of the darkness and found both the light and happiness at the end of the tunnel... and we want to do this with the people that matter most to us.  John wants it to be bigger than us and I have to agree.  We want to bring them together and have the absolute best time, not celebrating us, but happiness.  Life.  Our families and friends will probably never find themselves in the same room together again, and if they do, it will be for an entirely opposite occasion. :(

It would seem that the venue shouldn't matter much at all when you think about it.  The problem is, that is all that I have been thinking about and I still don't know.  Even though we are not in a rush to get married, it seems silly to wait 2 years for a venue.  But, if I expand my search any more, I truly am going to go crazy!  I'm going to go blind for one thing.  If someone could just give me a venue, I could make it work.  Hint, hint.

I can't be a bridezilla if I have this, right?  Hopefully one day I can actually open it up and start planning a wedding.









Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Out of the Darkness

Each year, The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention organizes Out of the Darkness Walks. These walks are a way to raise both money and awareness for suicide prevention.  Many communities participate in these walks on a smaller scale, but each year 1-2 walks take place overnight for 16-18 miles in a large city.  The first time that I had heard of these walks was in 2011.  It just so happened that it was taking place in New York City that June and it also just so happened to be taking place a month after Dale's death.  The idea intrigued me, but I wasn't ready.

This upcoming May will mark 5 years without Dale.  In June, the Out of the Darkness Walk will be back in New York City for the first time in 5 years.  I am thankful for every one of those five years to help me in my own healing and recovery because now I can say that I will be ready.  I am ready... to not only walk, but to share my story.

It is my hope to help raise money for both research and awareness for not only suicide prevention but for mental health as well.  If just one life can be reached and saved, then it is an effort worth making.  It is also my hope to help create a gradual and safe approach to telling my now, 6 year old son, how his father died, when the time comes.  I believe being active and perhaps making a tradition out of events such as this where my son can one day walk with me, may be one step in helping to lessen the pain and confusion.

In order to walk, I need to raise $1000 before June 2016.  I am hoping to raise the majority of that money through donating proceeds made from my Lemongrass Spa business.  I am also open and appreciative of anyone who would like to make a direct donation as well.  Below is a link to my donation page on the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention page.  Thank you to everyone for reading and if you choose to do so, for donating.  Hope is something that we all need and I have named my campaign... Hope for All.



http://theovernight.donordrive.com/participant/hope4all

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

What Money Means to Me

What does money mean to me?  I can sum that up quickly by using two words, opportunities and independence.  But let me elaborate, and I will start with the second.

Independence... To me, independence is probably one of the most important qualities that one can possess.  I correlate being independent to being free, to being able to make choices and decisions based on what is right for you, rather than something imposed upon you.

More than any materialistic possession, I value the independence that my money has given me more than anything else.  While I am lucky enough to have a stable job and to make a decent income, I have to admit that you don't have to make a mind-blowing amount of money to achieve this.  It comes down to what you value more.

My financial independence has allowed me to get out of some heavy situations and gave me the freedom to able to choose to live a happy and healthy life.  I am most grateful for the ability to support myself and Ewan after Dale's passing.  I had to budget like a bookkeeper, but we still managed to avoid uprooting our entire lives.  We were able to stay in our same apartment in NYC and I was able give myself time to figure out what was best for us.  Four years later and thousands of dollars spent on day care, babysitters, and trips back and forth across the state to visit my family as much as possible and I have no regrets about choosing to stay in NYC and to raise Ewan completely alone (for 3 and a half years, John put an end to that :)).

Opportunities...  That depends on the eye of the beholder.  Some want the opportunity to own their own home, to educate themselves or their children, to feed and clothe their families, to travel, to own a Prada purse, to drive a fancy car, and the list goes on and on and on.

Although I never would have considered myself a materialistic person, I did learn the hard way of having to let go of materialistic things.  I have moved so many times in my life and have also had to let go of so much of my past by saying goodbye to materialistic items that I now value the saying "less is more."  That is not to say that you won't find nice things in my home or in my closet.  As far a home furnishings go, I try to keep it simple.  As far as clothing and such go, I like to look nice, but I do not go overboard.  I think the average age of all the clothes in my closest in 7 years, no joke.

For me, I value giving my son opportunities... the opportunity to take karate classes, to see different things and to have a wide variety of experiences.  For myself I value the opportunity to try different things like taking photography classes or even starting up my own business hobby with Lemongrass Spa.  I value the opportunities that I have to travel and see the world.

Money does not buy happiness, but for me it does buy independence and opportunities, which are priceless.  Ironically, the more money that comes into my life, the more I realize how little is actually needed to obtain the happiness and the independence and opportunities that it buys, so much so that I find myself donating more money and finding charities that hold a true meaning for me to give to.  I am a good person, but by no means a saint.  I guess that I am just... happy.  :)

Thank you mom and dad.  <3

What does money mean to you?  What do you value?






Friday, July 31, 2015

Wiser or Just Old!?!



Is it true that with  age comes knowledge and wisdom?  It seems that with age and wisdom (if they come hand in hand) comes a practicality that can be at times... dull, lol.  For instance, take a look at the photo above.  Not the best of photos, but I think that you will get the point.

The heels in the back were my typical summer sandal buy for the past couple of years.  Fun, strapy, and sexy!  Last year when I went to France I bought the sandals in the middle.  I still wanted something fun and cute, but sacrificed a bit (okay, a chunk) of the sexy for comfort.  This year, the only new sandals that I bought were the two in the front.  The brown is a CROC!!! and the black mass is a weaved shoe with a wedge.  Do you see the digression here people!?!?!?!?!  :0

After walking a marathon in one day last year in Paris in my Aerosole sandals, I learned a lesson of sorts and the Crocs this year are my replacement for them.  They along side the black wedges will be joining me on this year's vacation.  I still feel like I could do worse, there are less attractive shoes out there, but I feel like perhaps I am only just a step away (no pun intended, lol).

I will be bringing one more pair of shoes... my sneakers.  That's right.  You read that correctly.  I will be bringing my sneakers on my romantic child-free vacation.  As comfy as those weaved wedges and Crocs may be, I don't think that they are going to be of much help climbing this...


Any guesses where we are going?!???
I think in the case of the sneakers, wisdom wins out, don't you think?  ;)



If aging doesn't grant us either, then I am wiser through my experiences... let's just hope that those Crocs work, otherwise it's back to fun and cute next year!!!




Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Beauty Inside

Two years ago, there was a short film series released on YouTube called The Beauty Inside.  The concept behind it is as the title suggests, however the way in which it was delivered was rather unique.  I loved watching this film two years ago and it is one that stuck with me.  I felt that it was the perfect follow-up to yesterday's post.

Please watch and enjoy...


The soundtrack was performed by Dustin O'Halloran, love it and him.  ;)

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

A Radiant Spirit

Is anyone familiar with the Turia Pitt story?  I wasn't until just a few days ago when someone shared a link on Facebook.  In September of 2011, Turia was running an ultramarathon in Australia when she became trapped in a bush fire.  She suffered burns on more than 60% of her body and even had to have fingers amputated.  The damage to her body was extensive and her recovery entailed countless operations and extensive therapy.  The doctor's have referred to her as a medical miracle as she now is able to live an active lifestyle as she had before... running, hiking, and biking.



I cannot image the physical pain that this young woman endured and probably still does.  What is even more unimaginable is the mental anguish that she endured as well.  What she accredits to her recovery both physical and mental... is her family and friends.  Their support helped willed her to use her positive energy to not give up.  Even more than that, she has used that positive attitude to be thankful for her life.  Instead of feeling pity for herself, she feels that she is lucky and blessed and doesn't want others to feel pity for her either.  Turia is now a motivational speaker and an activist.  

It is a story like this that captures a person's inner radiance.  And despite all of the scars, I can't help but to see a beautiful person on the outside when I see pictures of her.  She has inspired me to not feel pity for her, but the feel too that she is lucky for this new life that she has.  She has found a deeper purpose and has regained a quality of life too.  She also just got engaged!!! to someone who may have an even more radiant spirit than hers.



Turia's fiance is the same boyfriend that she had since before the fire, before the burns, before the change of Turia's physical appearance.  He was there through it all... the very worst and the deepest of the lows.  Turia says that he was her inspiration and he never stopped believing in her even when she couldn't believe in herself.  He is a very handsome man, but to be even more beautiful on the inside... she is a lucky lady.  They both are and I wish them all the best in health and happiness as they continue their lives together.  

To read more about Turia's story you can read it here on Australia's Women's Day or just Google Turia Pitt.  

Peter Lik's "Phantom"(above)  and "Ghost" (below)
I found these to be appropriate for this post, "A Radiant Spirit."





Sunday, July 26, 2015

While the Cat's Away...

My son has been at day camp for the past two weeks, leaving me with the most free time that I've ever had since before his time!

Right now, I'm lying on a blanket in Central Park's Sheep Meadow enjoying a gorgeous summer day and soaking up the last couple of hours before my free time is over.

Last week, I was in my hometown and Ewan went to a rustic day camp out there (the same one that I worked at as a teenager).  I filled my days with some shopping, running, and other odd errands.  I visited with my grandmother who at 89 is starting to slow down.  I had lunch with my oldest and dearest friend, Jessica.  It's been a tough couple of years with her going back to school to obtain her doctorate degree along side raising two children and working at the local college.  So we've talked less and less over that time period.  However, whenever we do see (or talk) to one another, we can pick up from wherever we last left off.  The time and the distance though does make it tougher to catch up and we find that we've missed telling each other some rather significant details at times.  But I love her and it was just wonderful to spend some time together without the kids.  The best part though was going golfing for the very first time, with my dad!  The golf part was both horrendous and fun, but it was just cool spending the day with my dad, just the two of us!

This past week I was back in NYC where I have even less free time (unless I buy it with a babysitter).  So I appreciated it greatly, especially since my sister came back with us.  It was great to have a partner in crime in which to explore the city!  Monday we went to DUMBO, The Brooklyn Bridge, Grand Central, Bryant Park, The High Line, and a rooftop bar!  We put on alot of miles and went right back to it Tuesday having lunch near Lincoln Center and taking a stroll through Central Park.  I can't remember the last time I have spend such a significant amount of alone time with my sister, if ever.  It was fantastic and more needed than I think either of us realized.  <3

Wednesday morning I found myself at the park running after dropping off Ewan, which made the decision of what to do on this day rather obvious.  Mani-pedi, of course!  Wednesday, I relaxed at home.  I place I hadn't really been in 12 days.  It was fabulous, lol.

Thursday, I finally made my way up to The Bronx and visited the NY Botanical Garden.  I can't believe that I've lived here now for 8 years and had yet to go.  But I did, and now I am a member, lol.  It was nice to be on my own time and to move at my own pace.  I brought my camera and practiced all of the different techniques that I learned (and was beginning to forget) in my photography class this past winter.

And finally, today.  My last day.  I had a good go and it was refreshing to rejuvenating to take off my mom cap for a bit.  I am looking forward to this next week though and spending time again with Ewan.  Time moves so quickly, especially the summer time.  Before I know it, we will be back in the school day routine.

LOL... I really didn't intend on writing a rundown of everything I did for the past two weeks.  Oh well, my mind is enjoying taking a break as well.  I know that I am lucky to be a teacher and to have this time off in the summer as well as to have had this free time for the past two weeks.  We all need some "me" time.  How do you spend your free time (kid-free, husband-free, significant other-free)?  



Monday, July 6, 2015

10 Ways to Make Yourself Feel Happier and Healthier

I came across this article and thought that it was quite good.  You can read it in its entirety here.  However, I will summarize it by listing the 10 ways this article claims will make you feel happier and healthier.

1.  Keep Mornings Calm
On weekends and during summer vacation, I do a decent job of keeping the mornings calm.  On work/school days though, not so much.  It just takes me sooo long to get ready in the morning.  Even when I prepare everything the night before.  I'm just so slow, then I have to do a mad dash to leave on time.  So, this is an area that I would like to improve.  I wish I were a morning person.  I envy those that wake up and go for a run and have breakfast... all with a smile on their face.  So that is something that I am striving to get better at!

2.  Make Time to Move
This area I do quite well in.  If I am not be-bopping around the city with or without my son, I am working out, or... something.  I spend very little time in front of the t.v. (but a tad more on the computer ;))

3.  Eat Real Food
Clean eating... when I put my mind to it, I can do it!  It's just that my mind is not always in it.  I have room to improve here.

4.  Reach for Water
This seems so simple.  Yet, I find this one so difficult!  I can work out daily and follow a strict diet plan, however, drinking 1/2 of my body weight in ounces is the hardest part for me.  It's not even that I am choosing other drinks instead.  Most days, I don't drink a total of my body weight.  I know how important water is for you and how bad it is that I am not drinking.  This is the one that I want to improve on the most!

5.  Listen When Your Body Talks
I am not keen on rushing to the doctor's, but I do try to pay attention to how my body feels and accommodate it accordingly.  It's important to be in-tuned with your body.  You know yourself best!

6.  Love Those Vegetables
And I do!  With a clean eating plan, it is easy to eat the required amount of veggies for the day.  This is such a great time of year as well for getting fresh veggies!  My favorites come from my father's garden.  I'm so psyched because I finally have some outdoor space and have tomatoes and peppers growing, yay!

7.  Invest in Fitness and Health
Between workout programs, shakes, healthy foods and now... natural skin care products, I do!  I even been choosing to spend my money here rather than on clothing, crazy!

8.  Remember to be Grateful
There is little that want or wish for.  And there is no one else's life that I would trade for.  I believe that if I want something, get up and go get it.  I am happy with my life and therefore appreciate all of the many blessings that I have.  

9.  Slow Down to Smile
Sometimes difficult in the middle of all the hustle and bustle of a busy day, but... this ones seems to go hand in hand with being grateful.  We all do need to slow down, take a deep breath, be grateful, and smile!  Life is good.  :)

10.  Rest
I learned this best when I was taking care of my son on my own.  If it meant leaving the laundry until the next day, then I left it.  If it meant, leaving things for the weekend to tackle, I did.  I rested when I needed and didn't overexert myself unnecessarily.  What I do need to improve upon here is going to bed at an earlier time.  Ironically, I go to bed earlier when I am on vacation and don't have to wake early the next day than when I am working.  

This is how I fair in these 10 ways to help improve health and happiness.  My goals:  drink more water, be more consistent in clean eating, and wake up earlier!  What about you?


Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Mind, then Body

Sticking with the theme of cleanses, I thought that a post about food would be appropriate to follow yesterday's about clutter.  I don't know about you, but my Facebook wall has exploded with meal plans, recipes, and selfies of before and after shots to showcase what clean eating can do for you.

I am a naturally thin person.  I have never had to worry about what I ate, let alone diet.  However, about a year and a half ago I noticed my waistline growing.  I first noticed it right after the holidays, in January, and at first thought that perhaps I ate way more Christmas cookies than I realized.  But by the time March rolled around and I still felt heavy, I knew it wasn't the cookies, it was something more.  I was bloated.  My waistline varied greatly not only from day to day, but even hour by hour.  There were times my belly looked as big as it did when I was 5 months pregnant!  That wasn't okay!
So, I decided to do something about it.

I had the p90x home workout program and loved it!  I felt fantastic after completing it the year before and so I didn't hesitate to buy the newest version, p90x3 to help get myself back to me.  I even added on the Shakeology meal replacement to help with any digestive issues I was having.  Well... I wasn't that impressed with either and I didn't see the results that I did with the original or what everyone else seemed to have that also used this program.

Fast forward to May 2015.  I had ruled out lactose intolerance and a gluten allergy (on my own, why go to a Dr.?) but still felt bloated, not all of the time, but enough where I was not happy with how I looked.  So, I decided to try another Beachbody program, the 21 Day Fix Extreme.  The extreme program was the newest and I wanted the extreme over the original because of the lack of results I saw with the p90x3 program.  Along with this program came a meal plan, a portion controlled extreme plan which consisted of clean eating.  I figured for 21 days, why not?  I gave it my all.

The results?  First, I have to say that I love Autumn, the instructor and creator of the 21 Day Fix.  The workouts were new and fresh and I was sore for 2 weeks straight!  Loved them!  As far as the meal plan went, it wasn't as hard as I thought it might be.  It was doable.  I was never hungry and by the end of the 21 days, my waistline looked like I wanted it to!  I definitely got what I put into the 21 days... literally!  I filled my body with nutritious and healthy food and my body responded by looking healthy and I felt healthy too!  Mentally, that made me feel happy and proud and sexy!

I finished this program about 3 weeks ago and the bloating has not returned.  I wasn't a horrible eater to begin with, that is why it wasn't that difficult for me to do this,  but I am a snacker.  Cutting out those extra sugars made a world of difference though.  Now I just need to find and maintain a balance of healthy eating and enjoying my cake and eating it too every once in a while.

Physical clutter in our surroundings can wreak havoc on our lives in many ways, but our own personal clutter, as in what we put into our bodies can do the same.  Our colon, kidneys, liver, and skin... all work so hard to protect us.  If we help them,  just a bit, that can make a huge impact on how you feel physically, mentally, and emotionally.

For me, when I began my journey towards happiness, my first step, as I shared yesterday was to declutter.  It was far easier to declutter my apartment than my mind.  But after I decluttered my physical space, I worked on my mental health.  It wasn't until 2 years later that I felt I was in a healthy enough mental state to move on to the next goal.  That is when I started to workout with the first p90x program.  You need to have a healthy mind first, otherwise you can diet and workout from morning until night and you still won't be satisfied with your results.

It's not about numbers (the scale, your clothes, your waistline).  It's about being healthy... mind and body.  It's about you being the best version of yourself and loving yourself for who you are!


Tuesday, June 30, 2015

A Clutter Cleanse

Little did I know that a book that I had picked up from a neighbor's stoop 2 months ago may just be that little self-help book that I was looking for.


I started to read this yesterday and I am about halfway done and so far, I have to agree with all that I have read so far.  I know very little about Feng Shui, but I do know a little something about clutter and how it can effect one's life.

I am one who lives in a constant battle of trying to maintain a balance.  I hate clutter.  It makes me feel anxious and uneasy.  However, despite that hatred, I am horrible about picking up right away.   So what I end up doing is waiting until I hit a breaking point and go on a mass cleaning attack.  Sometimes this happens daily, sometimes it takes a bit longer and turns into a weekly thing.  However, every time, I vow to pick up right away rather than wasting more time with a mass attack.  But... you guessed it, I still dance the dance.  The good thing for me is that I am dealing more with things that I (we, as in my family) actually use.  It is our daily things that make a mess (like my 5 year old's toys!) and those things actually have a positive energy.  This is not to say that I am 100% clutter free, I am not.  But I do try and live a more simplistic life, in terms of materialistic things.

Does clutter represent what is going on inside of you?
I can't answer for anyone but myself.  The book says it does, and for me, I have to agree.  Four years ago after Dale died, I remember having piles and piles of paper around my apartment.  I can't even remember where it all came from now.  Some was mail, some was paperwork I had to fill out, including bills and such that were Dale's, the others were just old things of Dale's.  Besides that pile of papers, I had piles of clothes that would build up weekly since I would deal with all of that only once a week.  I told myself it was okay because I had more important things to focus my little energy on like my son and for me, just to survive each day.
Eventually I found that putting all of these papers and piles of clothes on Dale's side of the bed was the best place to keep them for so many reasons.  One, everything was in one place and it didn't make the rest of my apartment look embarrassingly awful.  Two, and more importantly, I didn't feel the emptiness of his absence in the bed.
Did my clutter represent what was going on inside of me?  Absolutely!

Will I loose memories or have regrets if I let go of my clutter/past?
I moved to NYC 8 years ago with Dale and our 2 dogs.  We had a fully furnished 2,000 sq. ft. home and moved into a 950 sq. ft. apartment.  Where did more than 1/2 of our belongings go?  Storage, and we paid a significant amount for that storage space each month.
Two months after Dale's passing, I had the daunting task of going through that 12 X 12 storage unit and getting rid of the majority of my life, or as it had become, my past life.  I took as much as I could back to my small apartment... mainly mementos and items of Dale's.  The rest?  I had a yard sale, and it was painful to watch people buy and try to bargain for your things for prices that stab you in the heart.  What didn't sell went to charities.  I found that option to be better overall.  After dropping them off, I didn't really know what happened to them, but the belief that it went to people who were truly in need (even if it never reached anyone), that belief made it less painful.
Two months later, I went through Dale's closet.  If I came across something that I was unsure of, I kept it, everything else, I donated.  This was not an easy task, I cried almost the entire time that I was doing it, but it needed to be done.
Do I feel as if I have lost my past or have regrets about letting go of all of those possessions?  No.

What if I need something later on?
If you can't go cold turkey, so to say, then take baby steps.  In 4 years, I went from a 12 X 12 storage unit to a 5 X 8 extra bedroom.  Now, I have a 4 X 6 attic space that I share with John.  My first summer task, is to go through that and get rid of even more!
Have I got rid of anything that I needed later on in life?  No.  There was a reason in the first place most of those items were put away... I didn't use them.  If you don't use something over the time span of a year or two, you are probably not going to use them again.  And if you are, you probably would want a newer version.  

I chose to share my experiences of decluttering around the death of my husband because I think tackling this task around such an extreme circumstance may be one of the hardest.  The clutter that I had definitely represented how messy I felt my life was after his death.  However,  within 6 months, I sorted out and got rid of our possessions from our old home and personal items of Dale's.  Did I want to do it?  No way!  But I could feel it weighing down on me.  It was a daunting task.  It was extremely difficult and emotional.  But once I did it, I felt relieved.  I felt lighter.  It helped to open the door so that I could move on with my life (when I was finally ready to).

My biggest concern was letting go of something of Dale's that I would regret or want for my son later on.  In this case, once something of Dale's was gone, it was gone.  There were no more memories to be made.  So, when in doubt, I kept it.  Over the years, I eventually let go of more things.  Now, I feel as if I have a good representation of him to share with my son when the time comes, and I have no regrets.

As for me, this process made me value materialistic possessions far less that what I had.  When I moved into my new apartment this past November, I took as few things as I could.  Was it difficult to get rid of some of the last few things from my past (like the sofa I got as a wedding present, the armoire I remember carrying into the apartment with Dale in the pouring rain)?  Without a doubt it was.  But sometime you need to let go of the past so that you can make room for the future and all that is awaiting you.  Memories, not possessions, are the treasures that you will take with you wherever you may go.  

To be your best and most wondrous and radiant self, you need to start from the inside.  For me, de-cluttering was the very first step that I took in the direction that led me to a happy present and a hopeful future.

I am now looking forward to the second half of this book and learning about Feng Shui!

(Perhaps not so ironically, the first chapter in The Happiness Project is all about organization.)



Sunday, June 28, 2015

Summer Reads


My summer vacation officially began on Friday, yay!  And while I have plenty to do to keep myself busy, I do want to take the time and relax with a few good books.

I already plan on reading Gone Girl.  I saw the movie a few months ago and I really liked the twists and the psychology aspect of it.  It didn't go into it too deeply, so I want to read to the book to get to know the characters better.

Not so long ago, I wrote a post and used a quote by Audrey Hepburn.  That quote inspired me to learn more about her and I plan on reading her biography.  I actually looked last night, hoping to download it, the problem was that there were so many!!  Does anyone have any suggestions as to which book I should read about Audrey Hepburn!?!?

Lastly... I am at a loss.  I NEED YOUR HELP!  I am looking for an inspirational book.  Not necessarily a biography or a memoir, because I have to admit that I do like to read the self-help type of book too.  If you know of any book that inspires one to be their very best and to capture their inner and outer beauty, I'd love to read it.  Please comment any titles that you know of!  Thank you!!!


Monday, June 22, 2015

The Speed of Light

They say that time flies when you are having fun, but whoa... it's hard to believe that is has been 3 weeks since my last post!  This blog had gotten off to a semi-slow start to begin with and the last thing that I wanted was for it to come to a halt, but with today being my last Monday of work (YAY!) before summer vacation, I really won't have any reasons or excuses for long absences.

June has turned out to be a rather hectic month.  I'm always busy at work this time of year putting together slide shows and whatnot for the Pre-K, K, and 5th grade graduations.  I'm a technology teacher, so I am on the computer all day long anyways, however, putting together multiple slide shows really drives the eyes out of my head!  That is partially the reason why I haven't blogged in so long.  But, I am finally done with all of that too.  

What makes this year different is that my own son graduated kindergarten!  My son graduated kindergarten!?!?!!!!!  It's so crazy.  He's changed so much this year... all in positive ways!  I'm so proud of him for all of his hard work and for the little man he is becoming.  It's an exciting time!  It's also a heartfelt time.  As far as I have planned, he is my one and only.  I won't ever experience all of this again with a child and time seems to be passing so quickly with him.   

I was lying in bed with him tonight (out nightly ritual) and thinking about how he doesn't need me to lay with him anymore.  We both know he can go to sleep without any fuss without me, yet still we spend that quiet time together, even if it is just for a few minutes.  For a long time, that was my favorite time of the day.  But soon, that too will pass and we will have to find a new routine more fitting.  

Life passes before us with the speed of light.  It's hard to hold on to what inevitably needs to move on and change.  All that we can do to preserve those special moments is to enjoy them for as long as we possibly can before time catches up with us and passes.  








Sunday, May 31, 2015

A Reflection and a Purpose

Today marks the end of first full month for me as a Lemongrass Consultant and I wanted to take a moment post to reflect on this new venture of mine.  This is not only my way of organizing my thoughts through reflection, but to also share what I have done that makes me feel good about my inner self as well.

First off, I have spent lots of money.  But in a good way.  A fun way.  When I signed up with Lemongrass Spa it only cost $99 for a package full of samples to introduce myself to more products and to share with others during my spa parties.  I could have got by with just that, atleast to begin with, but when I really set my mind to something, like really, I like to go right at it.  I wanted to add more products to my sample kit, so I did.  I wanted to create an ambiance at my parties, so I bought glass jars, lemons, baskets, and even a lemongrass candle.  I've always wanted business cards, so I created those and had a blast doing so on Vista.  I bought some other essentials like soaking tubs and towels.  I bought little jars for samples.  I bought the cutest clipboards and colorful pens.  I have found Picmonkey and have become addicted to creating posters and banners because its so much fun!  Yes... I was/am that person and I enjoyed every bit of it!  That's part of the beauty of this, I have complete control as to how I want to present myself and my business.  It's such a fantastic and liberating feeling!

After buying and testing out a few items myself, I came to quickly realize how much I truly love the Lemongrass Products.  I use LGS products almost exclusively.  Facial cleansing, makeup, deodorant, bug spray, sunscreen... just about everything now.  There are some products that I absolutely love and there are some that are no better or worse from any other that I have used except... I know that LGS is safe and healthy for me to use.  I may not notice it in that instance, but in the long run choosing chemical and toxic free products is the better choice.  I almost feel dirty now when I use regular soap.  I feel guilty when I use the last of the old sunscreen on my son.  So I guess you could say I have been converted (and that I have splurged!)  And you know what, I am worth it!

I have probably had the most fun however with giveaways!  I have given quite a bit away for free.  Part of it has been to introduce people to Lemongrass Spa.  The other part is that it just truly feels good to do so.  I feels good introducing (mainly) women to a healthier alternative to products that they and their families use on a daily basis.  And although the products are more expensive than picking up something from Walmart, it really is not that much more.  The products are reasonably priced and worth the extra cost in the safety benefits.  I was a single mom for almost 4 years, I know how tight money can be, so finding an affordable product was very high up on my list.  It's not about the money.

It can be a tricky thing though... getting to people.  My friends have been great in supporting me and buying products.  So far they all seem to love them, which is fantastically reaffirming to me.  Social media is helpful as well in contacting people that I know, but do not see on a daily basis.  (I am actually holding a virtual Facebook party on Tuesday!)  Although I am finally starting to learn how to use Facebook as a business and its limitations.  In July I will start to expand out to family (next time I see them) and that is exciting.  But in the meantime, I need to be brave and bold and introduce myself to others out there... neighbors, parents that I meet through my son, etc.   I am not that outgoing and that is going to be a stretch.  I will need to step outside of my box even further.  At the same time, I should be prepared for some slow times and when they come... I need to take a deep breath and continue on.  Stay positive.  Stay focused.  And just enjoy the ride for as long as I want to stay on for!

Although I have stated that this is not about the money, there is money involved and I have been making it.  It's what I have chosen to do with it that has made this venture feel intrinsically rewarding.  I have used my money earned to help buy and use products that are safe and healthy for myself and my family.  I have used it to buy samples and full sized products to send and share with others.  I have used it to donate to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.  I have used it to help create and grow a business that can support the first three.  That makes me happy.  It's not just about me.  It's not just about my family.  It's about others as well and playing a small part in hopefully making a difference in someone else's health.  

I have to admit that I feel like being a Lemongrass Consultant feels more like a hobby than a business.  I am enjoying it that much.  I have found a positive purpose in doing this crazy thing called direct sales, something I never ever thought I would do.  










Thursday, May 28, 2015

Beauty Tips from a Legend


Audrey Hepburn will forever be known for her beauty.  Her elegance and her fashion sense was iconic.  Her outer beauty may have even outshone her inner beauty for anyone who was or even is unaware of the her selfless work as a humanitarian.  I have been inspired to learn more about this woman who seemed to have captured and emulated what it means to possess both inner and outer beauty and have decided to read her biography over the summer.  I'd like to leave you with this quote, which is what inspired this post to begin with.






Thursday, May 21, 2015

4

One thing that I have learned in the past 4 years, is to take each day as they come and to be grateful for each one.  That is not to say that there are not particular days that I look forward to more than others, but there aren't any days that I dread either.  I don't wish or count my days away.  Except... for one.

This past Sunday, marked that it has been 4 years since Dale has left us.  There is a part of me that cannot believe that it has been that long already.  Yet, there is another part of me that feels as if it has already been a lifetime ago.  It seems so long since I have heard his voice or have seen his smile.  So long.  However, May 17 is not the day that I would wish away.  What I came to realize that very first year is that it is the day before that is the worst.  May 16.  That was the very last day and for that, I cannot help but to carry an especially heavy heart on that day.

I am now on my 5th year of being a widow.  I'm no longer a rookie or a newbie.  I am a seasoned veteran.  I have been removed far enough from that initial shock and wound to where I no longer feel defined by being a widow as I once have.

Looking back on that first year, it seems surreal.  It took time to digest the reality of what had happened.  My head was swimming with thoughts and questions... trying to make sense of it all.  Fortunately for me, I had my son.  I had to get up and out of bed every day because there was someone who needed me.  I realized that the best thing that I could possibly do for my son was to be healthy myself and that first year, that is what I did.  I focused on myself.  I was broken and lost.  Bit by bit, I started to find some old and some new pieces of me and put myself back together again.  My 20 month year old son needed to be fed, bathed, given attention to, and loved.  He was not denied a single one of those needs while I fully admit, I put a strong priority on myself.  I feel no shame nor guilt in that because making myself better made me a better mom... A healthy and happy mom and I was able to accomplish and take care of both of our needs (without sacrificing his) because of that.

The first anniversary was very hard.  Everything was a countdown.  The memories and events were so fresh in my head that I relived the hell from the previous year all over again.  As soon as May 1st hit, it was like everything else stopped.  I dreaded May 17 and wished that I could just wake up and find that it was May 18.  I would have sacrificed a day out of each year so that I wouldn't have to relive the 17th... until the 16th came.  That is when I realized that it was his last day that was the hardest to get over.  So many questions... Was it planned?  Did he know?  What did he wear?  Do you bother to take a shower that day?  What did he eat?  Did he eat?  Stupid irrelevant questions that just overtook my mind.  The worst and the one that I have diverted my attention from every time it has come to mind are those last moments.  Trying to imagine what he was feeling.  Trying to understand what he was thinking.  Those thoughts are tough enough now 4 years later and I still push them away.  Four years ago, I couldn't go there at all.  I was afraid to fall into their pit.

The second year was about feeling alive.  It was about rediscovery and experiencing life as I wanted to.  As I wanted.  It took a great deal of acceptance... of myself and of my past to begin the process of letting go in order to truly start to move on.  It was with acceptance and ownership that I was able to take control of my life.  With a growing confidence I began to trust my gut and began to develop a keener sense of what felt right, of what was right... for me.

When the second anniversary approached, I did my best to carry on.  Life didn't stop with the beginning of May.  It only did for those two dreadful days.  I also tried not to relive all of the events that occurred prior to his death.  It didn't help.  It just made me feel awful.  There are certain memories that you cherish and treasure.  There are others that are better left to let go, as best as you can.  And that's okay.

The third year was about feeling beautiful.  I had worked so hard to become a person that I liked, a person that I was proud to be... and I wanted my exterior to compliment my interior.  I was back in the world of dating by then.  A world which was completely foreign to me and how you physically present and represent yourself is important.  I know that it was important to me when I met men as well.  It's not shallow.  It's... reality.  So for me, I started with my physique.  I tried p90x and felt fantastic when I finished.  My body felt great and I was super proud of myself for completing the 90 day workout plan (even though it took me a bit longer, lol).  I began to pay more attention to things like my hair and even went on a shopping spree at Sephora because I was in desperate need of learning how to do makeup!  It was fun!  The best part... I didn't do this mini-makeover for anyone else but me.  I chose the color hair I wanted, the clothes that I felt my best in, the makeup that made me feel beautiful, and worked out for the figure that I wanted.  When you make choices in that way, for yourself, and not to impress some guy or to try and be someone other than yourself, it works.  It is another way of finding yourself.  When you are the person that you want to be both on the inside and the outside (imperfections included and accepted) then you are whole.  This is the year that I met John.

I had been dating John for 6 months when the 3rd anniversary approached.  It was extremely difficult.  Because I had someone in my life and was moving on in the most difficult and intimate of ways, I felt as if I were saying goodbye all over again.  I had felt a tremendous amount of guilt... guilt for moving on, guilt for being happy, and guilt for being alive and having the chance to do all of that.  I cried more on the third year date than I did on the second.  The day after the anniversary date, I woke up and I felt as if a weight had been lifted.  It was a new day.  It was sunny and peaceful and with a deep breath, I took it all in, every bit of it.

This past year, my fourth, had its ups and downs and for that it was mentally exhausting.  My relationship with John developed.  He became a constant in both my life and in my son's.  This past November, we moved in together.  I continued my goodbyes by moving out of the apartment that I shared with Dale.  I let go many of my material things that I had collected and accumulated over the years with Dale.  I had to pick and choose what to save for my son and what to save for myself.  It was a very difficult process.  I had many dreams during this time.   Dreams that helped me feel more at ease and well as dreams that freaked me out.  In the end, once the move was complete, the dreams stopped and my mind found peace once again.

This past weekend marked the 4th year without Dale.  Unlike all the rest, it wasn't just a quiet day spend alone with my son.  I live with someone now.  My parents were also in visiting this weekend and staying with us.  There was no time or place to escape and as someone who appreciates and sometimes craves that alone time, I struggled without it.  Life went on as normally as it possible could this past weekend.  For the first time in 4 years, it didn't stop.  Perhaps that wasn't such a bad thing.  I guess that is how it should be.  Never forgotten, but it shouldn't be a day that I wish away.   May 17, 2011... that is the day on the death certificate.  That day will never come again.  I may very well see 50 or more May 17ths in my lifetime.  That is 50 days!  Fifty days is entirely too may to wish away.  You realize how precious time is when you experience a great loss.  Especially when just a mere 50 seconds of seeing that person again would be more than priceless.

Year 5... Who knows what this year will bring, I am just happy to be a part of it.





Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Pathways

There is nothing more freeing than taking ownership over your own life and making choices based on what you feel in your gut and what you believe in.  Even if the choices that you make don't end up working out the way that you would have planned or hoped, there is great value in knowing that you followed your own heart rather than an expectation imposed upon you.  I believe that is so empowering that even if you stumble, you are less likely to give up on finding the path that is just right for you.  Freedom is fierce!

Learning to trust my gut is a skill that I only recently obtained myself.  It's hard to weed out all of the other factors and influences... some can be so convincing!  But if you can honestly say that you know yourself, trust yourself, and believe in yourself... you're in.  It doesn't matter if you cannot see where the path is taking you.  As long as you can keep your head up and continue to put one foot in front of the other, you cross paths with the fun and adventure that awaits you along the way.  And when life decides to balance itself out and you find yourself in some tough times, I believe it is easier to accept what needs to be accepted, to deal with what needs to be dealt with, and to take what it is worth and continue to keep putting one foot in front of the other when your mind and your heart are in the right place.  A good place.  A healthy place.

I think that it is fair for me to say that I have recently begun a new chapter in my life.  I am not sure where this new path will lead me... what adventures and opportunities will come of it.  All that I do know is that it fees right.  I trust in that and that brings such a sense of comfort and peace.  And excitement!!

When did you choose a path that just felt right?  Did it work out the way you planned?  Did it lead to something better or unexpected?  Please share!!  :)




Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Finding Comfort



Last year at this time, I happened upon this quote and it gave me such solace.  This is a difficult time of year for me.  This Sunday, May 17th, marks that it has been 4 years since Dale left us.  During the course of the past 4 years, I have told myself many things to help keep my head above the water.  I've never veered off the path of reality for I don't believe that would help.  But I have laid out both my faith and hope in hopes of gaining peace and comfort.  To be completely honest, I am not sure what happens after we die and I am not up for getting into theories and religion right now either.  What I do know is that when I found this quote last year, it made me tear up immediately, for I want nothing more to believe that it is true.  I will never truly know if it is or not, but the want and the need to believe that it is possible makes the harsh reality of Dale's death a bit more bearable.  For that, I am grateful and hope too that someone else reading this will find that same solace in reading this as we have all lost someone that we loved dearly.

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Phenomenal Woman


Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size.
But when I start to tell them, 
They think I'm telling lies.
I say, 
It's in the reach of my arms, 
The span of my hips, 
The stride of my step, 
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman,
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please, 
And to a man, 
The fellows stand or 
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me, 
A hive of honey bees.
I say, 
It's the fire in my eyes, 
And the flash of my teeth, 
The swing in my waist, 
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman 
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them, 
They say they still can't see.
I say, 
It's in the arch of my back, 
The ride of my breasts, 
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing, 
It ought to make you proud.
I say, 
It's in the clicks of my heels, 
The bend of my hair, 
The palm of my hand, 
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.  
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me.

~Maya Angelou


                                                       




Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Operation Freedom Feet


This year marks Lemongrass Spa's 8th annual Freedom Feet Campaign.  Freedom Feet Kits are foot spa kits that are sent to women (and men) who are either stationed domestically or overseas.  It's a way to show them our appreciation for their service to our country.  We can all use a little pampering and relaxation, especially when you are on your feet 18 hours a day!!

For every 10 kits that are sold, Lemongrass Spa will donate one.  This year's goal is to send our 2,000.  My personal goal is to purchase 5 kits.  For each spa party that is booked with me, I will purchase a kit (up to 5 kits).  So far I have had 3 bookings and would love to have at least 2 more before the campaign is over (July 31, 2015).

If you would like to make a nominal donation or purchase an entire kit for $24 (shipping and tax included) to send to someone that you know in the service or to a random recipient, please contact me for more details.

Thank you!


Sunday, May 3, 2015

Living a Happy Life


Has anyone heard of or read The Happiness Project?  It came out about 6 years ago and it's a book/guide that focuses on a different topic each month for a whole year.  These topics are meant to help you polish up your life and make you more appreciative for what you have and to improve upon the areas that are lacking or bothersome so that they no longer influence you in a way that takes away from what is important and what essentially makes you happy.

I have attempted The Happiness Project three times over the past few years.  Shamefully, I have never finished.  The closest I got was to get to month six.  I am not sure why I was never able to finish.  It's actually a really good book, with lots of great ideas.  What I did accomplish, did make me feel... happy!  I wasn't planning on it, but now that I have written what I have so far on this post, it is making me think that perhaps I should attempt this project one more time.  Fourth time is a charm!?!?!?! ;)

The reason why I wanted to dedicate this post to The Happiness Project  is because one of the things that the author, Gretchen Rubin, did in the beginning of her book was to create a list of 12 "commandments."  I really liked the idea of creating a list of thoughts that I truly believe.  I also like the idea of sharing those thoughts out loud, whether verbally or in written form.  It is then that they become alive.  Below is my list of 12.  I made this list over three years ago and to this day, I have not changed one.  I love my list.  It's me.  And when I am able to truly follow them, I am... happy!

So here it is, my list...

1.  Trust your gut.

2.  Surround yourself with good people.

3.  Let go.

4.  Smile.

5.  Live in and enjoy the moment.

6.  You are stronger than you think you are.

7.  Find beauty in the small.

8.  Hold your head high, with confidence and grace.

9.  There are always two sides.

10.  Share your thoughts with tact and dignity.

11.  Just be.

12.  If you always choose the rational, you may miss out on the extraordinary.


I challenge you to create your own list.  I'd love for you to share at least one of your own personal words of how you live in a way that makes you feel happy.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Inhale with Gratitude

A few years ago I was at a spin class the night before Thanksgiving.  The instructor opened the class with this line, "Inhale with gratitude."  To this day, it remains one of my favorite quotes.


We all have something to be thankful for.  Even in the worst of times, there is something... for all of us.  For those who may be in the pit of despair, it still exists.  It is just hiding, but if you can hold on long enough, it will reveal itself and hopefully comfort you, especially when you realize its been there the whole time.  For those who may be walking on cloud nine, it is easy to lose track of your blessings.  It's easy to take things for granted. Those who find themselves in this position can be blinded from the same true blessings as those in despair.  It's so important to look at ourselves and our lives with clear and honest eyes and "inhale with gratitude."

When you realize what you have, it is easier to realize who you are and where you'd like to go.  When I think about my short list of my gratitudes, it really is my foundation.  They sit right at the core of who I am.  When I began my first blog three years ago, I did so for therapeutic reasons.  It was just months after Dale died and I was rather lost.  My very first post was (unconsciously) about the blessings that I did have in my life and it set the pace for what I believe to have been an extraordinary 3 years.

Here is my short-list, the 5 things that I am most thankful for...

1.  My son....  No words can do justice for what he means.  <3
2.  My family... My close friends are considered family too.
3.  My health... Good health is what I wish for anyone and everyone more so than anything else, even happiness.

I feel those top 3 are probably close to most people's top three (with children ;)).  My last two are more personal and unique to me.

4.  My independence...  I need to feel like I can breathe and to be able to make choices for myself.  I am very grateful for having been able to not only financially, but to mentally be able to take care of myself and my son on my own.  We were able to maintain our home and our lifestyle despite everything else in our lives changing.

My last one.  It's tough to narrow it down into five (I've actually had to think on this one a bit).  But last but not least...

5.  Second chances... Sometimes we don't get a second chance.   But when we do, we need to learn from our mistakes, from our experiences, trust ourselves and our guts and make it count!

What are you most thankful for?  Please comment and share.  I'd love to hear them!

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Welcome!

After sharing this new blog on Facebook (what did we ever do before FB!?!), I now consider it officially launched!  I have to admit that I am equally excited and terrified at the same time.  I'm excited to share thoughts, ideas, articles, and many other positive and inspiring words and stories that I come across with all of you.  I am hopeful that there will be a following on this blog, a community in which we can share and communicate from all walks of life, across states, even countries.  But I am also terrified.  I'm terrified in sharing such personal details about my own life mainly because of that innate need to protect my son.  There is much that he is not aware of because he is so very young and if I could, I would protect him from any and all hurtful truths and experiences that he can and will encounter throughout his life.  Since I am fully aware that is impossible, I instead feel the need to control what can be controlled.  This blog is releasing some of that control and it is scary.  I'm choosing to do this to help raise awareness, to let go and put faith in humanity, and to step outside of that comfort zone with fingers crossed that this decision will lead to something never expected and entirely worth it!  A friend shared this quote just yesterday, and I couldn't think of a better time or place to share it (thanks Melissa!).




Sunday, April 19, 2015

Choose Beautiful

I have to say,  I do love the Dove campaigns and their messages.  If you haven't seen it yet, check out this latest video.  "The power of choice is in your hands..."


What door would you walk through?

Friday, April 17, 2015

Hope for All


I did it...  I created a donation page with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention in memory of Dale.  It wasn't an easy thing to do and the write-up felt almost like writing his obituary once again.  But I am happy with the words that I chose and I am even more happy that I have finally done something in his memory in hopes of serving a greater purpose.

I am attaching a link to the page on this blog to track my progress in reaching my goal of $500.  I am not sure how this Lemongrass Spa business is going to go for me, so to begin, I am will be donating 10% of what I earn.  Ideally, I'd like to donate more and hopefully I will be able to do so.

Even though this donation page was made mainly for me to track my donations through my sales, it is open to anyone and everyone who would like to donate any amount of money to this foundation.  I will still keep my goal of $500 regardless if it is surpassed by the generous donation of others.

I'd like to extend a warm "thank you" to anyone who has been touched in some way and has decided to donate.  Thank you truly.

"Hope for all," because hope is something we can never lose.  Here is a link to my page...
http://afsp.donordrive.com/campaign/hopeforall





Monday, April 13, 2015

It Has Arrived!



It has arrived!  My Lemongrass Spa Consultant Kit arrived in the mail today!  I was so excited to get it and to try all of the different products, yet it is already 10:45 pm and I still have yet to take a close look at most of them.

I missed my deadline to invite people to my launching party by one day, so I was busy taking photographs (lol... living the dream) like the one seen above and creating an "Event" page on Facebook so that I could get the invitations out to everyone.  My big day is April 25th and then again on May 3rd. My apartment is only so big and there is a limit as to how many people I can comfortably accommodate, so I invited a big group of people and am letting them choose with the hope that the attendance will be balanced.

This past week, which is essentially my first week in the business world has been rather fun.  I launched my Facebook page and am 4 shy of hitting my first milestone of 50 Likes.  I just sent out invitations to my launching parties too.  I've also been planning and purchasing items that I think will make my spa parties seem professional and classy.  I bought some trial sized containers and little mesh bags to create free take-homes.  I have also bought towels and little soaking tubs for mini-pedicures.  I even bought some small decor like a lemongrass candle, a wicker basket, and lemons... just to help create a relaxing ambiance.

I have always wanted business cards and I am looking forward to designing and creating my own business card.  That is probably my next big to-do.  Well, right after making an order with Lemongrass for both myself (yay!) and for my parties!  I also hope to launch this blog by the end of this week as well.  The only thing that I want to have in place before launching  (sharing on Facebook) is my donation page for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.  That is an important piece for the inspiration behind all that I am doing and it needs to be there before I begin to share this blog with others.

What I have learned so far is that I need to be organized and I need to set dates and time lines for myself.  I am not sure how things will change once things start to develop and more sales occur.  I imagine I will need to continue to be organized as well.  I know that is a skill that I helps me as a teacher too.  I also know that I will not publish many posts such as this one.  Today I am just blabbing away, but I am doing that because I am excited!  We all need something that stirs things up for ourselves and makes us happy.

I just changed my Facebook profile image and it seems very fitting to share here to end this post.  I whole-heartedly believe this...